Ah, present gifting—a simultaneously fun and stressful experience for everyone involved. If you’re buying the gift, then you have to consider what the person likes, if you can afford it, what their style and sense of humor is… There’s so much to think about! Then, there's receiving the gift. Will the person get you something that you’ll like? What if you get socks again? Will they keep the receipt in case you don’t like it? Do people still re-gift things? Also, some people feel uncomfortable with people watching them open presents. Do you wish you could open presents after people leave rather than right there?
If you're buying a gift for a foodie, it can be even more difficult. If they have allergies, you have to take that into account. Then, there’s wondering whether you should go for a food or ingredient they definitely like or take a risk and try to broaden their horizon and get them something different. Will other people get them that coffee or cheese board? So many questions. We here at TheRecipe know that certain gift-giving special occasions are almost upon us. This has led us to ponder what kind of gifts we'd want from our loved ones. We love a good gag gift, but even we admit that some gifts push it too far. We found some of the best and worst gift ideas out there to help you with your shopping list.
21 Want: Candy Coal
Santa Clause supposedly gives coal as a punishment, but this candy seems far from a punishment. This bag of cinnamon-flavored goodness is a good gift for the friend or family member who may have ended up on Santa’s naughty list. Or you could buy this for your kids as a prank, but maybe only use it on older kids. Imagine the looks people would give if you just take these out of a glass jar and eat them. These coals are more useful than regular coal, so it's better than Santa's gift. Too bad it doesn’t come in more flavors.
20 Trash: Jimini’s Edible Crickets
Unless you’re a reptile, we doubt that you'd want crickets as a present. But hey, we won’t judge. It's rumored that we'll eat more unusual foods like crickets to survive. While sustainable living is absolutely welcome, we can’t quite stomach the idea of eating insects. Also, they really messed with the good name of Jiminy Cricket from Pinocchio and eating him. Real smooth move, lads. Give the gift of insect protein to your gym rat friends, and see how they react. Hopefully, they’ll take it in good humor, but we'd rather kick this into the trash than eat it.
19 Want: Boozy Chocolate Brussel Sprouts
Brussel sprouts may have been a trendy food last year, but that doesn't mean that we liked them. For us, Brussel sprouts were a vegetable that we had to eat at dinner or we wouldn't get dessert. The bitter vegetable isn't our favorite, but this we can get behind. Chocolate is always great, and ones with some booze in them are always welcome as an after-dinner treat. These are a cute gag gift that you can say is helping them get their five a day. The alcohol will certainly help with getting the real thing down.
18 Trash: Zombie Jerky
First of all, who'd want to eat people (besides Hannibal)? Second, we can’t imagine that zombies taste good since they're diseased and/or undead humans. Third, the green color is kind of off-putting. We know that this is just regular jerky made to seem funky in an undead way, but we just can’t imagine eating it. We'd prefer to fight zombies rather than make them into jerky and eat them. It might taste good, though–give it to your Walking Dead-obsessed friend, and let us know. We wonder if the jerky is made of just ‘flesh’ or if there are ‘organs’ in there, too.
17 Want: Unicorn Meat
The beauty of this gift is you think that you’re getting some kinda Spam situation but with unicorn meat instead of beef or pork. This is pretty horrific to think about, and the giftee may freak out a bit or laugh. However, convince them to open the can in front of you since you don't want to miss their expression. When they pop this can open, they’ll be greeted with a cute unicorn. The catch? The little plush is cut up into three pieces. A pretty sadistic move to pull, messing up a unicorn like that, but it's also pretty funny.
16 Trash: Bacon Cotton Candy
As much as we adore bacon, it doesn't necessarily go with everything. Some crazy bacon concoctions have some logic behind them, like bacon jam—a weird concept, but it works on execution. One thing we cannot accept is bacon cotton candy. Who decided this would be a good idea? Sure, salty and sweet flavors can go together, but this? We can’t imagine this being good in any way. Either it’ll be too sweet and barely salty at all or the flavors will just clash. If you wanna try it for yourself, then more power to you, buddy. Let us know how that works out for you.
15 Want: Baconnaise and Bacon Salt Set
We just talked about how bacon may not work with certain foods if it comes in certain forms. However, we see the logic behind this one. Although we understand bacon jam, we don’t necessarily want it on our burgers. Baconnaise and bacon salt make sense on a whole other level. Bacon salt is essentially smoked salt and spices to rub on meats, which is a classic and smart idea. Baconnaise is bacon-flavored mayonnaise, and as anyone who loves BLTs will tell you, that's a great combination. This set is an excellent choice for the friend who loves grilling it up in the summer.
14 Trash: Mother’s Toots
Okay, this is kinda funny. However, who wants to eat something that's supposed to be someone’s farts? That’s just plain weird. We don’t care how good this cotton candy tastes—the weirdness of the concept has put us off. Haven’t we already had enough of weird food trends that call perfectly edible things ‘poop’ or ‘farts’? We expect this kind of thing at Halloween parties but not in our everyday snacking and gifting. Also, why does it have to be a mother’s farts specifically? That makes it extra weird. We’ll just stick to regular cotton candy and keep our farts to ourselves.
13 Want: Zombie Munch Trail Mix
Trail mix is an essential snack for anyone who loves hiking, climbing, or biking out in the wilderness. The ingredients all balance each other out and provide a lot of energy for extended workout sessions. We imagine that these skills and snacks will come in handy during the apocalypse, and this company seems to agree. Zombie Munch trail mix has your back; whether you’re fighting zombies or out looking for shelter, these will give you the energy to keep going. Plus, if the worst comes to the worst and zombies do take over, these snacks last for a long time, so rationing will be easy.
12 Trash: Pickle Lip Balm
This is exactly the kind of gag gift you get in a stocking, laugh at for a minute, try once, and then never use again. Hopefully, this doesn’t taste too much like pickle, but if it does, we can’t imagine it’ll make eating dessert very pleasant. Only real pickle lovers will be into this but will maybe avoid straight-up eating it. Ingredients like salt and vinegar actually absorb moisture, so we can’t see what magic they pulled to make this actually work as a lip balm. That crazy alchemic feat definitely deserves to be recognized, if nothing else.
11 Want: Bacon Bandages
Time heals all wounds, and we believe that bacon does, too. These bandages are cute, funny, and practical all at once. You can show off your love of the delicious meat while healing yourself–now that's self-care. The best kind of gag gift combines humor with practicality, which is why we love this particular one so much. Plus, bandages in a ‘neutral’ skin tone never match anyone’s skin color, so it’s often more fun to get a whacky design to at least laugh through the pain. Any meat eater of any age can get behind this gift, so get it for all your carnivorous pals.
10 Trash: Pickle Candy Canes
Someone out there is really into pickles. Christmas is known for a lot of classic foods, including turkey, roasts, and casserole–but pickles? People all over the world have their own special food at Christmas; some people really have to have mac and cheese, others need greens, and some need pie. But we don’t know anyone who has pickles with his or her holiday meal. Whoever is really pushing the pickle agenda means business on this one. They clearly don’t shy from crazy festive creations to really put the can in candy canes. Convince your family that these are regular candy canes, and watch the horror in their eyes as they realize their mistake.
9 Want: Jolly Rancher Candles
Candles are always a lovely gift, as are snacks; this combines the best of both worlds. Jolly Ranchers are always a good choice for when you're craving a little something sweet and fruity. Our parents always used to have them in the glovebox of the car, ready to hand out on long road trips. Lighting these bad boys may make you crave something sweet, but who cares when you have a home that smells good and feels cozy. Grab a book and a snack, and enjoy the newfound ambiance this candle may bring. Buy matching ones for you and a loved one.
8 Trash: Pigs N Taters Candy Bar
Nope, no, definitely not. This is an actual food abomination. This chimera of potato chips, bacon, and chocolate cannot possibly be good. Who decided this was a good idea? What possessed someone to make this? Who buys this? People like you who are looking for some funny gift choices, probably. The only good thing this has going for it is the fact that you can buy a box of twelve and prank a bunch of people at once. That’s the next holiday party sorted. Buy this for that one co-worker you don’t like, and see how he or she reacts to it.
7 Want: Taped Sandwich Bags
Is someone always stealing your lunch from the office fridge? Next time you pack your lunch, pack it in this. It may make the person think twice about picking it up. These sandwich bags are also a great choice for that friend who's obsessed with true crime shows like Making A Murderer. Maybe he’ll be too into this gift you got him to recommend that you listen to Serial for the hundredth time. Practical and funny are always the best way to go in the gift department, especially if you’re looking for gag gifts.
6 Trash: None Pizza Left Beef Keychain
No one likes a dead meme. None-pizza left beef was a good meme for a while, but it's long dead. Gifting this may lead to an existential crisis over how fast the internet and life as a whole move these days. It feels like ages since we saw none-pizza left beef in the comments of videos and posts—who knows what meme will make it big next? Also, who even uses keychains? We always find that we get a bunch but only end up using a couple maximum; or else, it’s too bulky. If you’re lucky, the person you gift this with will replace an old one with this one.
5 Want: Banana Hand Lotion
Bananas are great. They go with so much, are a great portable snack with degradable ‘packaging,’ and are a classic feature in slapstick comedy. The banana-shaped casing for this lotion is so cute, and the smell reminds us of foam banana candies you could get from pick-and-mix stands. Hand lotion always comes in handy, especially during the cold dry months of winter. You can just throw this in your bag and always be prepared to combat dry skin. Again, it may make you crave something sweet, but you shouldn’t be afraid of treating yourself–you earned it.
4 Trash: Poop Emoji Mold Cubes
Why? Sure, emojis are kinda funny and useful in a text conversation, but why would you literally want poop in your drink? The kind of people who are into this are the same people who have that mug in the shape of a toilet. Toilet humor can be funny, but this just seems to skid a little offbeat for us. Ah well... it can be a funny moment during the summer barbeque with your friends. If they ask who these belong to, you can say they belong to the dog. This is definitely a gift for that friend you tell everything to.
3 Want: Ben And Jerry’s Lock
Ben and Jerry’s ice cream is a godsend. The ice cream and ingredients are good quality, the company fights for good causes, and the flavors are delicious. No matter who you are, there's a flavor out there for you, especially now that there are vegan and low-calorie versions out. While personal favorite flavors vary, buying Ben and Jerry’s can be a risky move. For starters, we've all said "just a spoonful" before blacking out and eating the whole thing. Second, if you live with other people, there's the constant fear of them stealing your precious ice cream. Not with this bad boy, though.
2 Trash: Pickle Body Pillow
Pickle Rick was funny, but if you own this, you may have gone a step too far. Body pillows, while often associated with… unusual… practices, can aid sleep. You can wrap your leg around it or wrap it around you to help you get more comfortable. However, you'd have to be really into pickles and sleep to be into this. Ah, well... it’s funny and pretty good quality material, so even if you don’t like pickles, you can get a good night’s sleep. Even if you aren’t into body pillows, this can be a good draft blocker for your room.
1 Want: Pizza Socks
When we were kids and someone gave us socks, we thought that was the lamest gift in the world. However, now that we're broke adults, the gift of some cute and soft socks is often a welcome present during the holidays. Now that everyone is Konmari-ing their homes and finally throwing out the holey socks, this will be a great gift. Plus, who doesn't love pizza? Pizza improves everything it touches, including your wardrobe. People should get into funky socks; it’s a great conversation starter. Get ahead, and impress everyone with your cheesy fashion choices.