A Not-So-Good Morning: 25 Of The Worst Things Ever Done To Coffee

Your alarm goes off super early and there's really only one good thing: now you're awake and you can treat yourself to a steaming hot cup of coffee. Whether vanilla lattes are your jam or you prefer black coffee and absolutely nothing else, you're seriously into coffee. It's okay, go ahead and admit it. There's no reason not to: everyone loves coffee and everyone loves that first morning sip.

Sometimes you have to drink your coffee super fast so you can make it work on time, and there are moments when you can savor your caffeine quietly, like on a weekend morning or afternoon. Despite the fact that coffee is perfection on its own (okay, maybe some milk and sugar are okay if that's what you believe...), people still insist on messing with perfection and doing some seriously weird things to this beloved beverage. It's hard to imagine improving on the stuff and yet people have definitely tried.

Are you ready to discover how weird this world of caffeinated beverages can get? Here are the 25 worst things that people have done to coffee. If you try any of these, you might not be saying "good morning", that's for sure.

25 Carrot-Cino

via The Independent

Oh yes, this is something that actually exists. It might be hard to believe (okay, it's absolutely hard to believe) but it's true. A carrot-cino is a latte in a carrot. If the only question on our minds is "why?" we wouldn't be alone there. People were pretty confused when this first appeared on the Internet and we have to say that we're still feeling that way.

If you want to eat a carrot, then eat a carrot (preferably with some hummus or something tasty to dip it in). And if you want a latte, then drink a latte. The two should have nothing to do with each other.

24 Buffalo Latte

via Chicago Tribune

Do you ever sit at your kitchen counter and think, "Man, I really wish that my morning coffee tasted like buffalo wings?"

Of course the answer is no... and yet a coffee chain in Canada came up with a Buffalo Latte. It had steamed milk, espresso, Buffalo sauce, and Buffalo seasoning plus whipped cream. Gross. So, so gross. We really don't even want to think about how weird this would taste, and this is almost enough to make us rethink ordering Buffalo wings (but not really because those are the best).

23 Taco Flavored Coffee

via McCormick

If you've ever had the thought, "I wish that my cup of Joe tasted like tacos" then you're in luck because there really is taco flavored coffee.

Oh, you've never had that thought? That makes sense... because this is pretty crazy. There's nothing wrong with enjoying some regular old coffee that doesn't taste like taco spices. If you really want some tacos in the morning, then go ahead and make some breakfast tacos or order them from a brunch place (with a side of coffee).

22 Broccoli Latte

via Herald Sun

We should have known that veggies would be part of coffee at some point. Some of us might have expected kale lattes to be a thing before broccoli lattes, but here we are: there is such a thing as a broccoli latte.

Chances are, we're thinking that this sounds gross and we would rather drink any other type of latte instead of something that has this green vegetable in it. No one could blame you for feeling that way. Just roast some broccoli instead (or melt cheese on it... that's always a good idea).

21 Egg Coffee

via Long and Short Coffee Roastery

According to Chowhound, this is a thing that people make in Minnesota: coffee with an egg in it. They explain how to make it: "Simply mix together one raw, lightly beaten egg with about 1 1/2 cups ground coffee and 1/2 cup of cold water, until it makes a kind of sticky paste. In a medium saucepan, boil 6 cups of water, and then dump the coffee-egg mixture in, letting the whole mess boil for three to four minutes."

We don't understand adding an egg. The idea is so the coffee isn't bitter tasting, but we love the taste of coffee, so that doesn't make much sense.

20 Banana Split Coffee

via Gay Lea Foods

Yes, you can buy a bag of coffee grounds that are flavored like a banana split. Let's be real: this is super weird.

Why would anyone want coffee that tastes like this dessert? First of all, it seems pretty random since it's not like people walk around craving banana splits. It's not the most popular or common dessert to make at home or order in restaurants. And second of all, would this coffee taste like a banana mixed with vanilla ice cream, caramel sauce, chocolate sauce, nuts, and strawberries? How would that even work? We're grossed out and also very confused.

19 Caramelized Honey Latte

via GMU Fourth Estate

If you're thinking that a Caramelized Honey Latte actually sounds good because sugary coffee drinks are your jam, think about how sweet this would taste. Starbucks had this drink on the menu in the spring of 2016 and it seems like it wasn't available for very long.

Wouldn't this be way too sugary?! Even someone who has a major sweet tooth and can't deal with black coffee would most likely agree with this. In fact, the Huffington Post wrote about this drink and said that it had 35 grams of sugar. Yikes. That is definitely a ton of sugar.

18 Coffee In Waffles

via USA Today

According to Time.com, there is a cafe that actually serves coffee in a waffle (or a waffle cone). This is, without a doubt, a pretty crazy thing to do to coffee.

Our feeling about this is the same as serving a latte in a carrot. We don't get it. If you want a waffle, then eat a waffle. It's a delicious breakfast or brunch dish and that's where it should stay. And if you want ice cream in a waffle cone, then yeah, that sounds good. Leave the coffee out of it and everything is going to be just fine.

17 Iced Cactus Latte

via Shutterstock

People actually drink iced cactus lattes which have cactus plus espresso plus milk.

This really seems like one of the worst ideas ever and one of the worst things that has ever been done to coffee. Coffee doesn't need a cactus flavor of all things. If fruit flavors don't work with the bitter taste of coffee, then how could a cactus? Also, we're probably thinking that people shouldn't even be eating (or drinking) a cactus to begin with, and that's a totally fair point.

16 Coffee With Cheese

via Putting Weird Things in Coffee

In Sweden, people like to dunk a piece of cheese into a cup of coffee (or drink coffee that has cheese in the cup).

Well... we do like cheese. And we like coffee. But we're definitely going to pass on this combination. There is nothing about this that sounds good. It sounds gross, actually, and we can't see how the two things would go together or help each other taste better. Even eating a plate of cheese with some coffee on the side sounds kind of weird to be totally honest.

15 Juniper Latte

via Refinery 29

All you had to do was walk into a Starbucks this past holiday season and you definitely noticed the Juniper Latte.

While we all love Starbucks and know that their lattes are awesome, we weren't so sure about this one. A Juniper Latte has juniper syrup. According to the description on the Starbucks website, "Our signature espresso and steamed milk mingle beautifully with juniper syrup. This beverage has a light, pine-like flavor with delightful citrus undertones. We cap this latte with velvety foam and accentuate the remarkable flavor with a dusting of pine-citrus sugar." Do we want a latte that tastes like pine? No thank you.

14 Iced Lemon Olive Oil Latte

via Caffeine86

In the summertime, nothing hits the spot quite like iced coffee, and an iced latte is twice the fun since it has milk in it.

Have we ever heard of an iced latte that has both lemon and olive oil? Probably not but this is actually something that has been done to coffee. Honestly, we're not convinced that lemon is a flavor that should be added to an iced latte, or that olive oil is a good idea, either. We're fine with plain iced lattes, no matter how dull that might seem.

13 Bacon Latte

via ABC News

Bacon shouldn't go anywhere near a latte as far as we're concerned... unless we're drinking a latte with our breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast. That would be fine (even if some of us would prefer black coffee in that scenario).

It's easy to understand people's love of bacon and desire to put it into all kinds of foods and drinks. But, honestly, let's leave bacon where it belongs (aka on our breakfast and brunch plates) and forget Bacon Lattes. These don't need to happen.

12 Apricot Cream Flavored Coffee

via QSRMedia Asia

If you want coffee that tastes like apricots (and, we guess, like cream, too), then you can buy a bag of coffee grounds that are this flavor.

If you don't want to try this, that's cool, too. You might not even like apricots, either dried or fresh, because not everyone is a big fan of this fruit. Apricots definitely aren't as popular as peaches or any other kind of fruit. It's tough to imagine wanting to sit down with a big mug of steaming hot apricot flavored coffee, that's for sure.

11 Chipotle Flavored Coffee

via CoffeeAM

The worst thing that has ever been done to coffee is this right here: coffee that is flavored with the super spicy chipotle pepper.

We would never, ever want to drink such spicy coffee. It just doesn't make sense. While some people might be cool with adding cinnamon to their cup of java, for the rest of us, that's just way too much to deal with. We are totally cool with a nice steaming hot cup of black coffee or a latte (and maybe a vanilla latte if we're craving something sweet). Otherwise, keep your hands off our coffee, please and thank you.

10 Orange Coconut Flavored Coffee

via Coffee Drinker - jiraygroup.com

We're not sure that we would put orange and coconut together in a baked good, so we can't say that we would be convinced that this would be good as a coffee flavor.

Actually, we could say that we're not big on flavored coffee in general. Isn't coffee amazing enough on its own? Does it really need to taste like coconut or fruit? The thing about coconut is that it's a super strong flavor and also an acquired taste. And citrus doesn't seem to go with coffee, either.

9 Jalapeno Coconut Flavored Coffee

via Element Shrub

On that note, it's also true that there is a flavored coffee out there that is jalapeno and coconut.

If coconut doesn't go with orange or any kind of fruit and has no place in coffee, does jalapeno make it any better? That would probably be a no. It's honestly a bit scary to even imagine drinking a cup of this flavored coffee. Would it burn our mouths and be way too hot and intense? We're going to go with yes. Seriously, what's wrong with regular coffee? This makes no sense.

8 Iced Raspberry Latte

via Yelp

First of all, raspberries are an intense-tasting, bitter fruit. It works well in desserts that also involve chocolate, but other than that, we might prefer strawberries or blueberries.

An iced raspberry latte is something that we can get at Starbucks, but we're not convinced that this is a coffee order that we need to make. It's one of the weirdest things that someone has done to coffee for sure since we don't think that adding fruit to coffee is a good idea.

7 Apple Pie Flavored Coffee

via Shutterstock

We kind of understand creating this flavored coffee because there's nothing like enjoying a baked good with a cup of coffee on the side. It's a great brunch treat or afternoon snack.

And yet... we just can't drink coffee that tastes like apple pie. This is too much of a stretch for us. It's kind of like potato chips that are flavored like pastries or cinnamon buns. It's okay to keep these things where they belong: totally separate from each other.

6 Creme Brûlée Latte

via Yelp

We've all heard of the Creme Brûlée Latte. Maybe we've even tried it. Are you getting tired of lattes that basically taste just like dessert? It's totally possible that you are because these are honestly super sugary and often they taste way too rich. If you want a dessert, then eat the dessert, right? Why drink it?

Of all the sweet treats that could be turned into coffee or a latte, we're going to go ahead and say that we wouldn't pick creme brûlée. It's not even the most popular dessert ever (now, a chocolate chip cookie latte, well, that's something that we could get behind).

5 Christmas Cookie Coffee

via Chef Jay's Kitchen

Coffee beans that taste like Christmas cookies exist and that seems totally unnecessary.

Look, of course cookies are the best and holiday cookies are even more delicious. They're fun to decorate and have lots of memories attached to them. Sitting down to a plate of Christmas cookies with a steaming hot cup of coffee is always going to be a good time. But why would coffee beans need to taste like these cookies? We want to eat these cookies, not drink them. It's a big no for this type of coffee.

4 Blackberry Latte

via Flickr

Again, a Blackberry Latte is not a combination that should ever have happened, and it's one of the worst things that someone has done to coffee.

These are sold at lots of cafes and it's truly mind-blogging why. Blackberries are an incredibly bitter and intense-tasting fruit and not on most people's favorites list. We're going to forget that we knew about this and think about regular lattes, vanilla lattes, and black coffee. Those are the best and blackberries have no place in a latte.

3 Maple Bacon Smoked Coffee

via Uncrate

Do we want coffee that tastes like bacon and maple syrup? While this is an interesting idea in theory, this might be too much for us to handle.

We are totally fine with eating pancakes or waffles with maple syrup with a side of bacon and a cup of plain, strong, hot coffee on the side. We really don't need any flavors to be added to that cup of coffee. Go ahead, call us boring. That's totally fine. We don't think that there is anything weird about coffee because it's so incredibly delicious.

2 Peanut Butter Cookie Flavored Coffee

via Amazon

Peanut butter cookies are delicious and a very nostalgic treat. You can probably remember making them with your mom and creating the super fun dents in them with a fork. They were great with a glass of milk and now that you think about it, they would go great with a cup of coffee, too.

Do you want your coffee to taste just like that PB-flavored cookie? No? Well, that kind of coffee does exist, just in case you did want that. If you think this sounds strange, a lot of people would probably agree with that.

1 Coffee With Sea Salt

via Food Touring

Sea salt is a wonderful flavor that works well in all kinds of dishes, from meat to vegetables. It's considered to be a pretty sophisticated and fancy thing to add to whatever you're cooking.

Would you add sea salt to coffee? Probably not because the idea of salty coffee is honestly pretty strange. Why would you do this? Coffee might taste a bit bitter, but that's kind of the appeal because it has such a strong flavor (at least hopefully... we all know that weak coffee is the worst). This coffee is sold at cafes in Taiwan and a lot of people make iced coffee that has sea salt in it as well.

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